Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[fortestyle]

In a small-medium sized group of close friends, there are two mentally ill people. It seems that one's mental health issues is affecting the other's mental health as well. For the second person, meeting up with the group of friends is one of the few things that keeps him going, but such gatherings are becoming less pleasant because of the first person's condition. Withdrawing from the group would lead to social isolation and potential deteriation of the second person's condition. Any advice here being the second person?

[Lemonjuice]

@fortestyle What are the mental health issues of the two people involved? Could you describe an incident as an example? Also, is the group totally social or is it a support group?

[JoeTheLion]

Hi @fortestyle,

Welcome to the forums. 

It can feel like such a dilemma when you really care for someone and are willing to make sacfrices to help them, but then it becomes too much of a burden to sacrifice too much. 

Ultimately only you can know what is right for you and your happiness. Do you have someone you can talk through your options with? Counsellors can be really helpful to talk through dilemmas. Lifeline is always there 24/7 to talk on the phone - 13 11 14 or https://www.lifeline.org.au/get-help/get-help-home for online chat in the evenings.

All the best

Joe The Lion

[fortestyle]

it's what used to be close knit social group

[NikNik]

Hi @fortestyle

I hope you don't mind, but I moved your discussion over to the carers side of the Forums, as other people may have had a similar situation within their group of friends or family.

It's really important that people put in boundaries to keep themselves well. It might be a good thing that this person has identified that it's not helping them to be around this person.

In saying that though, become isolated is not helpful either.

Does it have to be all or nothing for them? Could you organise catch ups in a smaller group every so often? 

I'm wondering if anyone else has come across this?

[Former-Member]

Hey,

I've been involved in issues like this and it got a stage where we contacted the parents of the people affected.

Not saying this is the best thing for you to do, but as a friend all you can really do is support them.... I'd refer to The Lion's response.

All they need is an appointment with a psych to get on the right path, this can be hard to convince someone to do but i hope the situation resolves itself.

Above all else, take care of you.