Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Alessandra1992]

This must be so frustrating for you @Jacob101.
His mental health team probably needed police to visit first, the police probably advised no threat to other people so whilst he may be angry with you and his mum, he might be OK with the outreach team.

Perhaps I am barking up the wrong tree.. But please keep contact with his team, perhaps he will be less distressed tomorrow..

[Jacob101]

Hi there. I went away yesterday and got back today. We swapped places this evening. He was very quiet. I tried to tell him that I haven't given up on him, we just need the effects of the cannabis to wear off so we can work things thru. It's all very sad. Breaks my heart. But what do you do when you seriously fear he could seriously hurt me. Will check on him tomorrow. Thx J

[Louise]

Hope things get better for you soon

[Jacob101]

My partner now just comes over unannounced. I drove him back to his house last night. He was extremely aggressive. I won't get into a car with him again. He came back today and stayed on my rooftop all day. I wouldn't let him in. I couldn't go out because I'm scared he will follow me or be waiting outside when I get back. I feel trapped. He doesn't say anything threatening to me but asks if I am scared of him. I've got family coming to stay in 2 days but may cancel that as I couldn't forgive myself if the kids felt frightened. He needs to go to hospital but refuses. Sorry just fragile today! Thinking of hiring a security guard. J

[blithe]

Hi @Jacob101,

Sounds like a very stressful couple of days. I'm glad you're keeping yourself safe. It's too bad that you may have to cancel hosting your family, but it's understandable that you don't want to scare the kids. Is there any chance they could stay somewhere nearby so you could still go see them?

Take care,

blithe

[Alessandra1992]

Hey @Jacob101, sometimes it is necessary to call for help as you need to keep yourself safe . Would your ex respond well to other trysted friends to help talk him down off the roof? Sometimes you may need to call the police..if you are thinking of hiring a security guard, call police first..

[Jacob101]

Thx for advice. I'm just monitoring the situation from day to day. I'm so glad I organised alternative accommodation for him. It would have been unbearable if we had to stay in same house. I can't ever imagine feeling safe around him anymore. His mood turns on a dime. J

[Linmerc]

Thank you for trying to explain the unexplainable. It really hit home to me that along the way there are choices