not feeling good

[Shaz51]

Well done for making it through such an emotionally difficult day @BlueBay 

and i am soo glad your husband took you to see your daughter and Little A ( the love of your life ) how wonderful xoxo

[BlueBay]

hi @MDT @Shaz51 @Maggie @Former-Member @Owlunar @Gazza75  abd others following 

went to pick up A this morning to come to our house. She played with jersey and after lunch we took her to the park. She fell asleep in the way hime. Now asleep in spare bed. She says she's a big girl because she sleeps in our bed. 
my d is coming later to pick her up. We're making home made pizza for dinner. And watch tennis tonight. Think the Aussie's are playing. 

i as thinking this morning I'm going to write out a "to do list" daily in my diary. Then I can tick off as I go. 


hope you are all having an ok day. ❤️❤️❤️

[BlueBay]

Hey @MDT 

I know last year you were applying for jobs. Can I ask you if it's ok? How m  as by jobs were you applying for. Was it hard. 
I know I'm a lot older (prob similar to your parents age) and finding it hard. Applied now three jobs in a few weeks - no luck. 

how did you cope with the let downs? 

[MDT]

Hey @BlueBay

Always good to hear from you

[BlueBay]

Thankyou my friend @MDT  xxoo

[Owlunar]

Hi @BlueBay 

I am so glad you are going to hospital soon - you reallly need the time and space to sort yourself out - it will take a little time to get through all you have been through and it's amazing but you have kept going through all of this

And I have asked myself often how you manage this - but you do - and you are not a failure and why would you not deserve the help and love the forum gives you. You are a bit scatter-brained with all the pressure you have had lately and although it's  something people go through you have had a load of it all at once - with one thing after another and this would be hard for anyone - you have BPD so it's harder but please give yourself credit for keeping-on-keeping-on the way you have been 

It's really been something - you can't see how strong you are but from the outside looking in - yes - you are strong

Maybe it's not time to be looking for work until after you have had a break and been to hospital to sort yourself out - then you will have time available to write resumes and look for work and make a full-time job out of it - maybe it's difficult were you live and you need to look further afield - and three applications is a few weeks isn't much - with the time available you can do more than that and let downs - yes - a lot of people apply for jobs - so a lot of people are let down - which is why you need to broaden your field - in distance - time - type of work - etc - and from reading your posts all the years I know you are well qualified - 

Looking for work's not easy - but it can be exciting - you don't know what might turn up - and you will be okay - I know this because you get through the worst of situations and manage it - you have done so much of that recently - you will be okay - I think the hard part is that you don't believe that but I am not the only person telling you

And looking for work is in the future - writing a to-do list each day and ticking it off is a good start - and you have plenty to do

I am thinking of you all the time - sending more hugs

Dec

[MDT]

Hey @BlueBay

Yeah it took me a while.

Best advice I have is set yourself a target for each day.

I started with about 1 per day. I applied for 1 job per day. Then gradually I increased it until I was doing about 5.

That may seem a lot. But just start with where you are comfortable and put as much effort as you can.

If you are older than me haha, then this means you have experience and i think it would be good to really emphasise that. Yes you might be older but this means you don't need to be trained and you can also be let free to do what is required of you. With age comes competence.

Let downs got to me at first. But then eventually I just accepted it.

A lot of the conventional bs wisdom they tell us younguns is that we can do whatever we want and show passion etc.

I think it's BS. I was simply trying to find a way to get money and experience. Lots of people a bit older than me told me what I should and shouldn't be doing but then I realised it was up to me to figure that much out for myself.

Eventually I got a job through persistence and also knowing someone.

Patience is the most important thing I would say my awesome friend 🙂

[BlueBay]

Thsnkyou my friend for your support and advice @MDT 

just walked for 30 min 

should feel great but ...... I feel crap!!

I can't be bothered 

no motivation 

very teary 

my mum rang to see how I went in my last day at wirk. I started to cry. 

@MDT @Owlunar @Shaz51 @Maggie @Former-Member @Gazza75 abd others 

[MDT]

Hey @BlueBay

Its okay to get upset. You obviously liked it there and thats a good thing despite the circumstances around why you had to leave.

Maybe give yourself a few days off of searching. Clear your head. Process that you need to look after yourself forst THEN look for work

When i was in the middle of job searching i did that when i needed to. In some instances i took a full week off job searching.

Do what feels best for you in this time i think @BlueBay

[Maggie]

@BlueBay  💙💙💙💙