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Re: Abortion ruined my life

Hi everyone, 

 

This is a very real and raw topic of discussion and it's great to see so much support and care. @Samantha3 the situation you are in is a tough one and it is great to have peers here to support you emotionally. Have you thought about connecting with a counsellor at all to get some one on one support with what you are going through? You might find it useful to reach out to PANDA (Perinatal Anxiety & Depression Australia) who have phone counselling (1300 726 306) to help with decision based pregnancy. You can also look into Marie Stopes Australia who also provide abortion counselling. 

 

Hopefully this is helpful to all that pass through here 🌸

Re: Abortion ruined my life

Hi Samantha,

 

I am so sorry to hear that someone else is going through a similar situation. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Unfortunately since writing this post things have not improved for me. I still carry the emotional wounds of my abortion - grief, regret, guilt, sorrow. I live with these feelings every day. Sadly, as I write this, I am going through a second miscarriage since writing the original post. So you have caught me at a particularly raw point in my life. I pray that your journey is not as tough as mine. Take heart in knowing that you are not alone. 

Re: Abortion ruined my life

Hi @CheerBear,

i have full support from all of my family and even my partners, which I’m really greatful for. But it is all still so hard. A part of me just thinks that he’s not connected to it yet so doesn’t feel the same pain as I do. 

Re: Abortion ruined my life

@Cottee I'm so sorry to hear that things haven't improved and if anything they sound harder for you. Having an abortion can be an experience of great loss which is something I found over the couple of months since I had had mine. The miscarriages you've been through in addition to that would feel like more loss or layers added to that I imagine.

I hope there is space for you to be gentle and kind with yourself through what you're experiencing and the significance of it to you.

Re: Abortion ruined my life

@Samantha3 it's great that you have the support of people close to you in your life. As far as your partner goes, I think even the most understanding and empathic people could struggle to understand what the feelings involved in this one might be, how intense they can get and the connection you can have with the life growing inside you (if that is how you see it as it sounds you do - I kind of swung between 'life' and 'cells' and struggled to work out what I thought about that one. I have nothing but respect for however someone views what is going on inside their own body though). I agree that the connection with a pregnancy can often be much stronger for the person who is actually pregnant. It is so hard 🙁

I was encouraged to reach out to those closest in my life to me as often it can be helpful to seek the support of our family and friends when we are struggling. In a way it can be super helpful as they are the people with us and who can offer important support. I also remember a counsellor saying that with this decision sometimes speaking with people who are part of our lives can also have the flip side that each person will bring their own thoughts, concerns, beliefs etc to those conversations, even with the strongest intentions not to. Because of that I found it incredibly helpful to speak with people who were not personally involved in my day to day life and those who could offer unbiased support. For me that was professional people - counselling helplines, my GP and my mental health worker.

How do you feel about the idea of speaking with a professional person outside of your family? There are heaps of options for that if it is something you'd like to do.

Thinking of you
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