Somewhere_light
Casual Contributor

How do you cope?

I am exhausted, overwhelmed and feeling down. I am not coping well with his illness. He is very argumentative and controlling. It has been many months I got to have a moment to myself, he gets a little anxious when he is not near me and he doesn't trust me being alone so he is always monitoring my movements or he gets the kids to stay with me. He has been diagnosed with this illness for a couple of years now, we've gone to counselling many times and he has taken medication in the past but he has always been in denial of his condition. He has been off meds for over 6 months now. He is clingy and feels very comfortable expressing his angry thoughts mostly to me. I am tired of the emotional rollercoaster, daily sudden outbursts and suspicious thoughts. Does it get any better or will it get worse?. We have no family or friends support so I am dealing this on my own. Seeking help from strangers is out of question. 

5 REPLIES 5
Former-Member
Not applicable

Re: How do you cope?

Hi @Somewhere_light
I care for my husband with BPii + more. I am assuming it is your partner who perhaps has a Sz or BP diagnosis.
Lack of insight makes dealing with a diagnosis particularly difficult not to mention dealing with this on your own and not having a break.
You might need the help of your counselor to be able to set boundaries in order for you to get in a breather. I will tag you in thread that explains lack of insight.

Re: How do you cope?

Hi. I can relate to your comments totally. My Husband has BP3 or that's what the Doctors say. My husband on the other hand doesn't think he has. You will need to do whatever you can for yourself. I go out to the shops and walk around looking at everything for at least 2 hours just to get a break. My husband doesn't think anyone believes him anymore, including me, so we have grown apart in the last year. Please look after yourself first, your husband, I assume has the help he needs from the professionals? It is important to find a hobby and get involved in it, really involved. I know at times you will feel tired and "over it all" like I do but I guess we live in hope that oneday the condition will be under control and so we can have a better time of it. I don't like being on the rollercoaster ride of emotions all the time. Take care. Talk anytime.

Re: How do you cope?

Hello @Del, @Somewhere_light and welcome to the forum HeartHeart

My husband has had depression, anxiety , SAD, GAD and Bipolar !! , Inherited depression all his life

I am his second wife and have 4 step children who are adults now with the same MI as their dad

I am still learning to cope , mine is trying to find the right balance

I opened 2 threads which i have taged you to have a look

one is "THe ups and Downs of my Husband`s MI"

and the other one is " Carers Hints and Tips to success "

Letting you know you are not alone and I have found here great support

Former-Member
Not applicable

Re: How do you cope?

@Somewhere_light

Topic Tuesday tonight 7pm AESDT Carer burnout

Re: How do you cope?

Hi

My wife has Bi Polar and that is hard enough. I dont how you wives cope with husbands with the same condition.

Most important step is getting your husband to realise he is ill, once he has accepted that fact he might start to look for help and take meds.

The meds is all a bit of hit and miss however.

The only positive thing that might help is there are 1000s of carers out there just like you struggling to cope with the same problem.

Zorro