Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Nes]

Thank you for all of the links, they are very helpful!

[Nes]

Sorry, medication from a psychiatrist.

[Grasshopper3]

@Nes

Welcome to the forum, I hope you have some time to read some of our stories. I keep bumping into old posts and there is so much to relate to, my only wish would be to meet in person. Face to face would work beter for me. This will never happen because of confidentiallity I guess. 

I am also in Perth, W.A. and have a son with paranoid Sz. ADHD some OCD but he is growing out of the last one as not that severe anymore.

You can read more of my story if you have time. 

People with MI (Mental Illness) can only be helped, if they want to be helped. My son has been enrolled with WANDIS, which will be called something else soon I just forgot the new name. 

This means there is funding for a Mental Health worker to visit him once a week. 

Perhaps you could look into doing something similar wtih your son? I find boredom makes my son drink, I work full time and try to keep him as busy as possible, so a visit once a week from a mental health worker just doesnt cut it, but it's better than nothing...

I can recommend Holyoak for alcohol and drug dependend behaviours. My kids and I went there after we left their father, as we were very much affected by his alcohol abuse. (they also do courses for families effected by loved ones with addiction).

I give my son little chores to do, take him for walks every day and swim with him weekly. He occassional does some volunteering work. He is taking a lot of anti psychic drugs, and these make him tired and lacking motivation all the time.We have seen new psych today and he wants to wean him off again, I will write more in my story later.

There isn't a lot of 'me' time, when you constantly worry about your loved one with MI but make sure you look after yourself too, take a break now and again, I know I should be doing the same!

I'm back to bed, work tomorrow, but please keep in touch.

All the best xx

Grasshopper3

[Former-Member]

Hello @Nes

I am surprised that your son read my words....

do you think he was upset or just shocked? 

if this is making him think about long term...drugs and alcohol rehabilitation where he stays and abides the rules for whatever time the programme requires would be a longer lasting result...

cutting back does not work if there is an addictive personality...how do we know if they have an addictive personality??most of them hide this side of their lives ...only discovered once addiction is evident..

Yes Carers mental health australia will draw up a contract between yourself and a psychologist...I think it is for 6 months and the appointments have to be used within that time period..

or gp can put you on 12 month mental health care plan with psychologist.subsidised by medicare...this is what I use now.

either way depending on your own mental health which if is being affected I think any gp will refer you..

last number of calls have been in a different tone of voice...very icy..which I recognise from when he was first detained...alerting me to the fact that he is having symptoms more often...he was diagnosed as being very ill 17 months ago.  his tone is frightening as I believe he is frightened..his text messages demanding and horrifying details...an idea of the torment in his head

I obtained a second opinion and the psychiatrist told me that should he smoke any more weed which he had stopped for a period...without proper medication he would incur permanent brain damage...

I don't know how much you want to say to your son....

perhaps tell him rather than let him read...my son has been in mens homeless shelters...where I first found him interstate after ringing police...psychiatric hospitals...had missing persons reports...when spotted responded calmly telling them that he was on a holiday having a break from his parents...so reports cancelled...3 times 

he eventually found a place to rent but that has been broken into about 3 times and his possessions that he has amassed mainly through father giving in  and sending money have all been stolen each time...

I have put  large amounts in for each christmas and birthday in his account...I have also paid for emergency accommodation after speaking to the hostel myself...I have given emergency money for a new laptop because last one stolen...his many different mobiles and laptops are his only form of communication..when I was last able to communicate with him he was in another state...hiding after breakin at his rental place...still paying the rent and wanting money for hostel accommodation in second state...would not let me know where he is..

I have had to set boundaries again and again...have not spoken to him since early december...

yes something does shift inside us....for me eternal grief...loss of my son ..will I ever get him back?

[Grasshopper3]

@Former-Member
I don't know what to say, I wish there was better support for you and him. Thank you for writing it all down, I now have a better picture of what events are playing in your life and you are very courageous woman. I only hope your other son and hubby are supportive of you and they make you feel a little better that way.
Support for you is the way to keep moving forwards.
Always in my thoughts,
Grasshopper3
xx

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @Nes ......

Sz is not part of our immediate story, but it is present in the family background. There are cousins who have come through early trauma with it, but are now medication compliant and their lives and relationships are now stable.

I just wanted to tell you that so it supports your hope for your son, and for you @Former-Member and @Grasshopper3.

Support for my son (the younger one) has been the triggering of a personality disorder, which springs from a personality type, which is prevalent in my husband’s family ..... but it appears to have triggered in our son through the behaviour of my hubby, who is very unwell with mi without any awareness that he is. The personality and behaviour changes in him have been challenging to say the least, and there is other disordered stuff going on, including distorted thinking, OCD behaviours and eating disordered behaviours.

We are supporting the recovery of our son, without my hubby realising his need for intervention.

S2 (Son 2) is recovering ..... a personality disorder, once treated and managed, becomes simply a personality type once the disordered state has passed, apparently. In any case, this journey has been a real education ..... one that helps us understand both the history and the future of our family better.

Hang in there @Nes ..... hold to your hope and keep swimming .......

[Former-Member]

Hi @Nes

If you put @ at the front of a name ie @Former-Member @Former-Member they will get an alert to let them know you have responded.

[Cazzza]

Hi Ned, I live in QLD & my 34 year old son was diagnosed with Negative Schizophrenia last year. He lives at home and struggles every day. It breaks my heart to see him this way. I find it hard now to get him out of the house

[Faith-and-Hope]

@Nes .... message above for you .....