Functioning with ADHD

[AuntGlow]

@creative_writer I have a lot of friends who are unwell atm too... something is definitely going around. 😔 Even so, it sounds like you have done a couple of really nice things for yourself this weekend! What kind of place did you go to for lunch? 

The scarf sounds so pretty! What outfits will you wear it with? 

I mostly worked and house-hunted this weekend. I am very sleepy. 😂

[creative_writer]

@Jynx it is true sometimes we go backwards and that it can be part of recovery. Maybe it is something we have to remind ourselves when we feel disappointed.

I think focusing on finding a way to help me be productive is the alternative to getting lost in spirally thoughts. Sometimes I go into control mode because trauma felt so out of control when it happened. It feels out of control when the spirally thoughts come, even though I know on a intellectually levels it’s not happen, sometimes my mind starts acting like I’m there again.

@AuntGlow my unwell-ness is more so related with the chronic health symptoms I experience on a regular. I ate a burger, it was okay, a bit sweet and didn’t feel super well after digestion wise. I think I might eat something else when I go out for my birthday dinner next weekend, something maybe a bit easier on the gut and more tasty. I am thinking Persian food for next weekend.

I got it for dressy pink outfits, I think it would go perfectly with pink formal dresses.

Sounds like you had a busy weekend, house hunting is another job on top of work. It doesn’t surprise me that you’re sleepy

[Jynx]

@creative_writer absolutely, and sometimes 'going backwards' for me has been more like an opportunity to strengthen the lessons and hone the strategies that I found the first time round. It can be frustrating and discouraging at times, like 'ugh THIS AGAIN' - but we get better and better at pulling ourselves through.

I hear you, it can feel like the only way to keep ourselves from 'drowning' in it hey. I guess I was curious because it sounds like finding a 'solution' to your brain fog has itself become a rumination. But that's just my perspective - does it feel that way for you?  

[creative_writer]

@Jynx I vanished early since I had to get up early today. I did some of my blood work today, I have more to go, which I am thinking of doing sometime next week. I can’t be on my period and need to stop all supplements three days before. I thought my period would’ve come by now, still not here yet. Hormones are being annoying this month. I’ll probably be on my period on my birthday this year, my period does have to come eventually.

I rather drown in finding a solution for brain fog and attention than drown in trauma memories. Both are not healthy. Maybe part of my brain believes if I keep thinking of solutions for brain fog and attention, it’ll help me stop ruminating

[creative_writer]

Now I have had the blood celiac test, I’m going to do a gluten free or low gluten diet (I want to sneak in bday cake, not sure if it wise for my tummy) to see if it helps me feel better. It’s either celiac or non celiac gluten intolerance. I appear to have shit loads of intolerances. I feel like the antibiotic courses this year haven’t helped my stomach, I’ve had like five courses over six month period. I swear I’ve been moodier since my last antibiotics course recently. I’ve also been left with a stubborn yeast infection that I seem to get all the time.

I really want to be less cranky, but my patience is running low. I want to the swirly thoughts to stop, but it’s hard. I know they say everything takes time. I know my psych wanted me to learn to sit with trauma intrusive thoughts, I’m able to manage for short periods, but I find I keep getting them throughout the day

[creative_writer]

Trauma is weird, it has made me into a control freak. It’s hard to be okay with uncertainty, not sure if that is also common in NDs. I need to let go, but not sure how

[creative_writer]

Maybe I need to give it time and I know change doesn’t happen quickly. But will my mental health get better, after I start feeling less inflamed? At one point, being chronically inflamed does take a toil. Chronic migraines, chronic pain around joints, chronic infections, slow hair growth, chronic fatigue and chronic digestive issues

[rav3n]

hey @creative_writer lovely to see you around 💖

physical and mental health tend to go hand in hand. when one improves, the other tends to improve too... and if one worsens, the other can worsen too. a holistic approach seems to work best in those cases.

[creative_writer]

@rav3n maybe it's one step at a time. Mental and physical health are so enterwined. It's been a rough year for sure. I sort of felt guilty last year that I wasn't holding up with full time study, I knew other people were able to study and work. I know I probably wasn't well, and it's been hard to accept it for so long. I am slowly trying to be okay with taking time off for myself. I have felt enormous pressure to be employed. The job industry is hard, it's hard enough with competition, but putting my attention and focus on job applications have been super challenging with mental and physical health challenges. I know realistically I may need some time to regain my strength despite what this fast paced world says

[creative_writer]

I’m feeling a bit better, but I reckon it’s going to take a while till I feel much better. I still have crippling anxiety, but it is not something that will disappear overnight